I Spent Friday Night Catching Up on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Here’s How I’m Feeling.

Guys… I just mainlined four episodes of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D in one night. That’s four hours worth and I am feeling like a crazed maniac fangirl full of feels and anger.

I have not had a turnaround of “Noooo, it can’t be” to “Oh my God, can someone just SHOOT THIS GUY IN THE FACE” as quick as I’ve had with Ward. No, he’s not being controlled. He’s doing all of this willingly because he feels like he owes someone who was only slightly less abusive than his own family.

Yeah, I don’t care about Ward’s family background or the fact he loves Skye. He’s still an irredeemable Nazi lapdog who sees his relationships with people as a “weakness” and is a misogynist asshole who only sees Maria Hill and Natasha Romanoff as eye candy.

Koenig should have shot him in the face when he had the chance. We might even still have Patton Oswalt on the show as the only light in this current darkness where nothing’s going to be good again until Guardians of the Galaxy and things are STILL going to be terrible on Earth. Instead, he was garroted and stuffed in the ceiling. THANKS A LOT, GRANT.

Speaking of ‘The Only Light In The Darkness,’ can we talk about Audrey for a second? Beautiful, magnificent Audrey who fell in love with Phil when he promised to protect her from Blackout and he continued to do so, even after he was supposed to lay low and be dead. This plot line was really only good for introducing the fact that people have escaped from the Fridge, but I don’t care. MY LIFE IS FEELINGS SOUNDTRACKED BY BEAR MCCREARY NOW. WELL, ACTUALLY, IT HAS BEEN SINCE I WAS SIXTEEN.

Of course, this is when Fitz starts being a big annoying baby and being resistant to change. Yeah, you’re in love with Jemma and you think Ward is your friend. That doesn’t change the fact that Triplett is here now and on Simmons’ radar and that Ward has killed people. Stop acting like Trip is the problem and Ward is the victim, especially that last one when you have someone who has witnessed his actions up close telling you how awful he is.

I swear, this whole plot line is a good metaphor for rape apologists. It’s really refreshing to see two women be the ones to tell a man to face the truth about their friend doing something wrong and the wrongdoer not being forgiven just because he has feelings for one of the main characters. Fitz’s behavior about it is frustrating, but it’s believable, which makes it all the worse.

Trip and Skye continue to be awesome though.

If anyone ever doubted Skye’s spy game, she definitely works it well against Ward to buy the team some time and to expose Ward for who he truly is. Granted, she’s still got a lot to learn and she still lets him live when Mike Peterson stops his heart, but I was cheering for her the entire time she was playing Ward like a violin. She didn’t need to drop a mic when she revealed she turned him in to the cops, but you could definitely hear it.

Also, Raina (who hates being called “Flowers,” Garrett. You are not Sawyer) is starting to catch on to Skye’s 0-8-4 status with her research into GH-325. Which is hinting that Raina might have a similar status? We’ll see if the Kree come to play for the both of them. At least I hope it’s the Kree. I’ll even take some other weird alien connection for the both of them. Either way, I do NOT want that stupid fan theory of Skye being Carol Danvers to come true. I love Skye and I feel like the show is not going to go that direction, but still. LET CAROL BE CAROL.

Speaking of GH-325, I’m surprised there hasn’t been more mental breakdowns over it yet, but that’s probably because they’re already commencing. At least for Coulson because he might actually be suffering the side effects that he warned Nick Fury about. I don’t know who said whatever you imagined about Project T.A.H.I.T.I. not being as bad as the reality, but they are certainly spot on about it.

As for Trip, I totally vote for him being the new specialist next season. Because Ward needs to be dropped to the bottom of the ocean. Hopefully by Fitz and Simmons after they’re rescued (SHHHHH YOU CAN’T CONVINCE ME THAT THEY’RE NOT GOING TO BE LAALALALALALALA). Trip is hella smart, cute, and adorable and he actually cares about the science team! Or maybe just Jemma, but I think you all know how hard I ship them at this point. Also, HE’S THE GRANDSON OF A HOWLING COMMANDO! I won’t harp on that too much because Trip wants to be measured for his own achievements instead of his grandfather’s, but HOWLING COMMANDOES. Maybe that means Gabe and the rest will be in Agent Carter? I could live with the first S.H.I.E.L.D agents all being Howling Commandoes.

On a final note for this recap-esque thing, raise your hand if you want to see more of May’s mother. Preferably in an episode where her, May, and Hill go on a road trip and be sarcastic former secret agents to each other. Because oh my god, the sarcasm was strong with both her and Hill in the episodes they were in. Private sector Maria Hill and May’s mysterious mother are my new favorite things.

That, and the fact May and Coulson have made up. Awwwwww.

…I really hope that one of them isn’t going to die in the finale.

What pain does the season one finale of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D have for us? Will the just announced season 2 just be a giant lead up to Avengers: Age of Ultron? Well, we’ll at least find out the first one when the episode ‘Beginning of the End’ airs May 13.