Hannibal: Futamono Recap

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Hannibal: Futamono (02×06)

Synopsis: *pterodactyl screech*

Rating: ★★★★★

EVERYTHING I EVER COULD HAVE HOPED FOR HAPPENED AND WE’RE ONLY ON EPISODE SIX AND OMG SHIT’S ABOUT TO GET REAL.

Just be warned. This is hell along and shit.

So, before we begin let’s take a moment to appreciate the fact that Frederick Chilton has sort of become one of the best freakin’ characters on this show. No, seriously. He was always just an annoying dude in the films but in this how he’s become so much more. Somehow he’s the only one who seems to really know what’s going on – besides Will – and I’m so okay with that. This episode is wonderful for so many reasons and Chilton is one of the top three.

But anyway.

Will – because he played his hand way too early in trying to get Hannibal killed by his psychotic orderly friend from last episode – is understandably in a predicament. He’s clearly upset because he knows he done goofed and now Hannibal really is aware that he’s after him. Jack is pissed off at him for doing it because Jack is dumb and still hasn’t put two and two together yet. Alanna refuses to talk to him because she can’t believe he would do something like that which, you know, is kind of understandable. And, honestly, Will kind of deserves it. I know he was hurting after Beverley was killed but c’mon, man. You know Hannibal is smarter than you. Without Beverley and this orderly you are effectively out of option.

Well.

Almost out of options.

At least he still has Dr. Gideon.

And at least Jack seems willing to listen which is more than we can say about him earlier on in the season. Will explains that the Chesapeake Ripper is eating his victims and that it’s likely that coincides with Hannibal’s dinner parties. If there’s one thing Jack can’t deny it’s that the murders do tend to coincide with the times he’s been invited over to Hannibal’s place for dinner. It’s nice to see that Will might just get Jack thinking, right? Except then Will asks, “Who does he have to kill to make you open your eyes?” and then it pans to Alanna making some skewered heart-based dish with Hannibal and I was just like NOPE.

“Thematic dish” my ass, Hannibal.

Then the two of them just go on and on about how sad they are about Will. And then Hannibal is all, “I’m writing a musical piece about the experience on the harpsicord because of course I am” before we cut away to him selecting a business card from his rolodex of death. After which we move on to one of the most intricate crime scenes we’ve probably ever seen.

Just a body strug up against an uprooted cherry tree with a bowl full of poisonous – and beautiful – flowers. No big.

Also, Jimmy and Brian seem to have gotten over Beverley’s death pretty easily. They’re back to their wise cracking and shit pretty quickly is all I’m saying.

Jack is also way too quick to turn back to Hannibal after all this. I mean Will just literally told him Hannibal was feeding them all people and he almost seemed suspicious. But, no, he sits there listening to Hannibal talk about how he has to give up on Will and give up the FBI because it’s not good for him psychologically or emotaionally. Jack is totally buying it, too, up until the point where Hannibal says he’s going to have a dinner party. Bahahaha. DON’T GET YOUR HOPES UP. IT WON’T BE THAT EASY. Hannibal’s not stupid. He’s so not going to make this food out of people. (He’ll just save the people for himself.)

But then we switch to Will and Gideon talking between their cells and right about that point I literally slammed my head against my desk because Chilton is listening and Gideon explains IN EXCRUTIATING DETAIL how he was in Hannibal’s dining room. Like, he not only explains what happened exactly and how Hannibal suggested he go after Alanna but he describes the damn painting on the wall (which, remember, is of Lena and the swan… it’s of swan rape) and the center piece on the table. Will is obviously manipulating Gideon into saying these things and it’s kind of hilarious how shocked Will seems when Gideon just starts spewing everything out because I suspect he thought it would be harder than that. Though, he very blatantly says that the Ripper will be coming for Gideon unless they stop him so maybe Gideon’s trying to save his own ass. Who knows. Will also says – knowing he’s being recorded – that Hannibal is going to come after Chilton, too. Because Chilton, Will says, is getting close and the only way either of them will survive is if the Ripper is stopped.

This all brings us to why I love Chilton: he goes to Jack.

He takes these recordings to Jack, explains that it’s impossible for Gideon to know these details without having been there, and further proves Will’s point by telling Jack that it was impossible for Will to have told Gideon those details because every moment of their lives is recorded on tape. He’s just so chill the whole time, too. Like, he tells Jack how grateful he is that he can’t process protein any more after Gideon played with his innards because it means every meal he has with Hannibal is salad only for him. And then when Jack asks if he believes Will and Gideon he brings up that time Hannibal served him tongue and then joked about eating Chilton’s. He’s totally freaked but also totally sure that Will’s been right the whole damn time. The whole scene is priceless. Frederick is priceless because then he even goes on to match up Hannibal’s dominance issues and medical knowledge with their profile for the Chesapeake Ripper just to cap it all off.

Smartest guy in the room, right here. Frederick Chilton. You go, girl.

The science guys pinpoint their cherry tree murder victim’s location of death to Virginia which is nearby and they’ve already ID’d the guy. The location seems like enough for Jack to go to Alanna to talk about the issue but she doesn’t seem to want anything to do with it. Jack’s actually starting to possibly believe Will but Alanna stands behind Hannibal. She can’t get past the fact that Will just tried to kill a man she’s known for a good decade. And even though she’s out walking his dogs with Jack and still sees that good in Will she’s recognized that he’s not being truthful, he’s manipulating people, and he’s dangerous.

She just doesn’t understand that Hannibal is the one who is really dangerous.

She doesn’t understand that she’s just a pawn in this game Hannibal is playing.

Will knows, though. Hannibal is going after her specifically to get at him. He comes to the hospital to confront Will, blames him for Beverley’s death, and makes it very clear that others will suffer because Will came after him. He’s going to hurt people. Just maybe not in pursuit of a fancy dinner party. After probably picking up a bit on Jack’s suspicions and what Will has been saying and what Gideon has been saying he makes makes all the dishes at his fancy party out of very expensive meat – something Jack discovers when he takes some back to the lab for testing.

I’m telling you, Hannibal’s not that stupid.

The dinner party turns out to be hella entertaining for the viewers at least. Chilton is there to keep up appearances so Hannibal doesn’t see him as a threat and just the way he says it is absolutely hilarious. Because HE REALIZES IT RHYMES. HANNIBAL THE CANNIBAL. IT FUCKING RHYMES.

You could learn something here, Jack.

Except then Hannibal WINKS AT CHILTON AND I DIED. I died. Poor, Frederick. Borrowed time, buddy. (Though, to be fair, since he really does need to be around to gloat when Hannibal gets incarcerated he’s probably the only character besides Will and Jack whose unlikely to die this season.)

As you might expect, the whole dinner party thing still serves a purpose for Hannibal beyond wining and dining wealthy friends and what not. It winds up being part of an even grander, more devious plan.

He seduces Alanna (which isn’t hard considering last season Alanna asked why they hadn’t had an affair back when she was a student) and sleeps with her has an alibi to take out Gideon. Gideon was safe while he was more or less safe under Chilton’s lock and key as long as he played along. But he pisses off Chilton after insinuating to Jack that Chilton fed him the information about Hannibal’s dining room and he had already pissed off the hospital staff by killing their co-workers during his time there and later during his daring escape. So all that together kind of leads to him being beaten and thrown off a stairwell on to a guard station where he breaks his back and winds up in a civilian hospital.

Not that he stays there long. Of course not. He gets swapped out for a dead guard whose been gutted and strung up…. WITH FISHING LURES AND HAND TIED FLYS. YUP. FREAKIN’ HANNIBAL. Realizing that the Ripper had to have come for him, Jack goes to sort of not!confront Hannibal about it. Which, you know, leads to that awkward moment where Alanna walks into the room in one of Hannibal’s shirts to serve as his alibi.

Goddamn it, Alanna.

Later, Hannibal – alone now except for Gideon – makes a very, very fancy dish out of meat wrapped in meat and a giant leaf cooked in a clay shell. It’s a big ass piece of meat, let’s be very clear there. Want to know what it was? Yeah. Gideon’s leg. Well, one of them. He’s just sitting at the table where Hannibal left him missing a leg when Hannibal sets that dish down in front of him in a clear homage to the infamous brain eating scene in the Hannibal film. At least Gideon – like the silo muralist – is insane and seems some how able to accept this fate. None of the rest of us would have been able to be nearly as quippy at the end. At least not when someone is trying to FEED US OUR OWN LEGS.

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It was nice knowing you, Gideon. I’ll miss you, you crazy bastard. (Also Eddie Izzard’s deadpan delivery of everything.)

While Gideon and Hannibal are having their last meal the science guys – after telling Jack that the meat is not human – give him some good news. Rather, they give us good news. The fly lures that the guard was strung up with include the DNA of all the Ripper’s recent victims from the show including the muralist, the judge, and Miriam Lass. They also include all of Will Graham’s alleged victims. Jack finally says what we’ve all been waiting for: “Will didn’t kill any of these people… it was always the Ripper.”

But they didn’t just find the evidence needed to prove Will’s innocence. They also found a rare tree bark that led Jack to some abandoned barn in the middle of nowhere full of cherry trees and shit. Because apparently it’s just okay to go into compromising situations associated with the Ripper alone like this. Because that totally worked for Miriam Lass and Beverley Katz.

If you thought Will’s innocence being prove was the real OMFG moment of this episode just wait. Jack goes into the basement and start checking through these vats in the floor and what does he find?

Miriam Fucking Lass.

I told you all two episodes ago that chick was still alive some place sans an arm and I was totally right. I’ll bet that’s what Beverley saw in Hannibal’s basement and so he moved her after the fact.

But yeah.

Holy shit, right? Yeah. Watch the trailer for next week and then talk to me.

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Yeah. Will is free. There’s an obvious warning in Chilton’s voice about the Chesapeake Ripper setting him free as they both know who the Ripper is and what he can do. You’d expect Will to play it safe, build a case. Do something, right? Yeah. No. Instead all we see is him going home to greet his dogs (and probably a still very upset and disgruntled Alanna who still won’t forgive him for trying to kill her new boo). And then we see him pointing a gun at Hannibal in the guy’s kitchen.

The way Hannibal flinches when the gun is pointed at him makes me believe that someone else is there watching and Hannibal is keeping up appearances. Either Alanna walks in or Hannibal calls the cops when Will shows up and he just gets arrested again.

Who knows.

What I do know is that Will Graham’s lack of strategy when facing cannibals is rivaled only by Rick Grimes.

I mean, shit, guys. These people clearly have the upper hand. Be smart.

Unfortunately, it seems like being smart isn’t even necessarily a guarantee because, predictably, Chilton becomes the prime suspect after Gideon’s death. Since, you know, Gideon basically told Jack that Chilton told him to say everything that he had said.

This show. My #feels. I can’t.